A lot of thing has been happening since my last note. Well, as anh Tri said: ” Well, that’s normal for you. You change. Every time I see you”

I don’t know and I’m not sure how many time I single handedly running myself into trouble. Like right now, I feel like the I’m exactly in the same situation many times ago. “History repeated itself” or I would say ” Mai stupidly repeated the prison out of her own experience AGAIN”

As much as I want to spend time doing something useful, I can’t find myself doing anything, except watching Netflix. I have so many thoughts running on my head that the only logical way right now is to write it down and just look at it with a wishful thinking that the situation will somehow assuage itself.

Lots of things are suddenly squeezing in my time that I feel very stressed and exhaustion gonna come soon. Suddenly in a very small amount of time, somehow I have to do the following things:

• Finishing my massage course ( 30 hours a week)
• Spend roughly 5 hours 3 days/ week to cure my sickness ( 15 hours )
• During that time, I also need to find a way to take care of my visa
  • Extending my current tourist visa
  • Preparing to get a new education visa
• Working for Ly ( around 3 hours / day )
• Practicing flute 1 hour/ day
• I will finish my massage course by Nov 1st, cooking course on Nov 2nd, I have one day to pack and move to another place. Should I fly on November 3rd ? or Should I fly in on November 4th ? Should I give myself a little bit of time like one last free day.

On top of the list of things that I was supposed to do, there’s also an emotional turmoil that’s going on in myself. Is that it ? this is the end of my time living in Bangkok ? I know that I complain about it a lot, but overtime, I grew an emotional bond with the place, my apartment, the security guy, the “Cha Nom Yen” lady. The pavement that has been in construction since I moved in and only was just about to finish I guess maybe in 1 or 2 weeks. Finally the walk way between the building and the BTS is nice again. I’m guessing the city is getting ready for its tourist season.

Funny enough, despite all the things that I have to do, I spent them wandering about the book store, watching other unrelated things and finally writing this note.

“We are the prisoner of our own experience”

Vietnam Wars