In my previous “social active” life I must have posted hundreds of post, exposing my thoughts to the world. Among those posts, this particular one stays on my mind. I still remember my first business, the Convenient store from Shop & Go, I already had this idea in mind that I want a series of small businesses. I don’t want something so grand so big and so focus. It’s the same with this idea of small home.
You know, this house which I randomly take the photo on my walk home from Helsingor station is exactly what I want. A small yellow house with greens around.
In this lifetime, I must have lived a total of 3-5 lives. A life of an obedient child, a life of extreme wild drinking kid, a life of wanting to save the world, almost being a mom, I can tell you that I’m entirely different from one another. It’s a blessing that I have the ability to change, but also a curse because I can learn so quick and so fast, I can see boredom before boredom came.
My friend – Phuong, who lives in Canada at the moment, who talk with me a out life twice a week, stay exactly the same since I started reconnect with her. I started knowing Camel when I was still working with Tripfuser, having a small office in Camette. In the course of 3 years and 2 months that I’ve know him, I have turned my life upside down 3 times – Airbnb , Tripfuser , Le Cordon Bleu, Bliss. He’s still the same, exact same position, same company, same place.
This indicates that I’m the odd one out from the society. I’m not only the odd one out in the family, but also the different one from society. It seems like I kept going from one place to another until I find something. It seems like I may have found something right now, but I’m not 100% sure.
What I am sure at the moment is I’m 100% introvert, and I have becoming extremely introverted. You know, to the point that I think I don’t need anyone else to live. I feel like if I was put in a desserted island, I will be just fine as well.
The pandemic of Covid at this moment is more of a psychological pandemic rather than a real one in Saigon. People treats people with mask on etc .. but the reality is the symptoms at this point is very mild, the virus has adapted into the new form the form that can be co-existed with human. I read about this kind of revolution some time ago, a virus that kills the host so fast and so quick is actually not smart. If they kill the host, eventually it will kill itself ( like the Black Plague), but with the Delta – Delta Plus strain in this new adapted world, it spread faster, but the symptoms is mild. This means from the revolution perspective, it has adapted to human like other viruses ( flu, tuberculois, HIV .. )
A thought coming to my mind on the way to work today, I feel like my “duyên” with Cô Việt has almost come to an end. I am no longer feel a sudden drop of heart beats when Cô texted me, or I no longer felt like I want to hate her, I still has no feelings to her. I can think of her logically, how terrible of a situation she is in right now, and she must have been so sad etc, but I can not feel her through my heart. She remains a stranger that I perceive as debt to me.
