Cần Thơ, 7/4/2021

I just realized that this is the first vacation that I’ve had every since I don’t know, forever? I can’t recall the last time I went somewhere without a purpose. I went to Hoi An to check out the house, I went to Dalat to meet the strawberry supplier. This is the first time I go somewhere just for the sole purpose of going.

I needed these moments so much, prior to this trip after receiving the arm chair. I have spent exactly 36 hours without stepping out of my apartment just to stay inside ( I didn’t even leave for food). The chair is so comfortable, I just sat there contemplate about life. After that, being in this small island in the middle of the mekong river, I’m continuing to contemplate about life.

I have come to the conclusion that each and everyone of us on this planet brings with us at least one struggle/ pain in life. There’s no such thing called happily ever after.

My friend – Thuy, travel around the country with her 2 sons – 1 is 3 year old, 1 is 5 month old alone. She brought with her a nanny. She’s still living in her parents’ house. Her “husband” lives in a different home, the one she doesn’t want to move in. As far as I concerned, she’s a single mom. She has all the money she can spend for the rest of her life, but she doesn’t have any freedom. She’s either living with her parent’s or her inlaws. Her task is to give birth, and then later on take over from dad and Mom. I told her to pursue dream, to find something that she love and work so hard for it. But she couldn’t. The price of being a pampered child, with lots of money around is freedom.

Thuy’s mother, just recently suffer from severe depression. The depression is so severe that she totally lost her mind. I mean she doesn’t know who she is, and what’s she doing. Thuy’s mother, a successful woman, has a very obedient daughter, a hard working husband, a rising business. They just recently bought Inox Hoa Binh, I mean they are that rich, they have that kind of cash floating around. Yet she’s depressed. Turns out her husband has a second wife, and a 13 year old son.

My mother, who also has more money she can count, a perfect husband, 2 smart, hardworking daughters. Yet, at the end of her life, her husband’s gone forever without returning home after 25 year apart. Another daughter ( me) became estranged with her, her brothers and sisters don’t like to be around her. If I put myself into her shoes, I can understand that she’s totally devastated. It’s almost like she has worked her whole life and then at the end of the life, everything crashed. Because she has nothing else to hold on, she only has resentment as a lifeguard. I feel sorry for her, in my eyes, I saw a very sad woman who’s so lost in this world. The only thing that she has left is to scared people around about her death. This death was constantly in her speech, as a threat to others. To me though, I don’t feel scared of this threat, nor her brothers and sisters. I feel like she needed death, at this point in life, death is actually a mercy to her life. I feel, if she can be able to be gone in a dream, with a light death, it would be her luck. I feel this woman has no purpose in this life, that she’s so lost, so a fresh start would be the best for her. She’s in so much pain, there’s no point of living anymore.

My other friend – Khuong, spending the better half of his life, looking for a life partner, a perfect one. Now ended up with someone he just met for 2 months, because she’s pregnant.

And many many many more that I cannot count, or put into this life story. I have to realized that there’s no such thing called happiness. There’s happiness in each and every moments of the day, but as a whole, there’s flaw, there’s pain, there’s imperfections.

This realization makes me sad, because I want total happiness. I want to do the thing I love, be with someone I love, have lots of children, have lots of dogs, cats. Well, I already carry around with me my mother’s scar. So there goes no happily ever after for me as well.

I named this blog “pain”, but after finishing writing it, I’d like to call it imperfections. Just like my ice cream, it’s imperfect. There are days that we marvel at the texture, there are days that the work is eh ! mediocre.

I have some news:

• Takashimaya – one of the biggest mall in Vietnam invite Bliss to join a food fair 😀 . This means that we have made enough impact.
• Someone just arbitrage Bliss into the North, hand carried with him 50 pints of ice cream to sell at 295k / pints. This indicate that the market is ready for me.
• Last news, I found the perfect seal machine for the ice cream, from now on we will have seal. As soon as I can find the money to purchase the machine.

I guess this is to lighten up the mood of this blog post. Ending this post with a high note makes me happy 🙂