Hi !

It’s only been 2 days that I haven’t written on this blog, but I cannot begin to decribe the turmoil that I has been through in the last 48 hours. After I finished this blog , I went to a witch doctor to help me bring out all the “tà khí” or coldness outside of me. It’s not some kind of witch doctor that you think, it’s just simple cupping but the impact is quite visible. My headache has gone completely, I no longer have to suffer from that.

The ending note of the last blog is sorrow, and that kind of sorrow follows me through the last 2 days. Even right after writing it, I sat and pause for so long before I could stand up and go to bed. This sorrow is gentle and soft, there was no tears, it feels like the sorrow fairies has cast the sadness dust onto me. I walked more heavily, I breathed more tired, and I thought more painful.

My main staff quits, effective immediately on Sunday. I have been having trouble in the kitchen department for awhile, it’s because of the workload, the gossip and the people talking about each other. I have had to intervene quite a couple of times. Mostly it was because my sous chef is working in old style and she has a difficult time fitting in.

My sous chef quits meaning I will have to work extra hard in the kitchen until I can find someone can replace her. That is why I can’t find any time writing in this blog. My mood is extra down and extra tired, yet I have to work really hard these days. Funny thing is, I don’t see any of this is work, it’s a very different thing from working for a company. I see this as part of my life, something that I need to do, like doing Yoga.

I have had a very very interesting dream this morning. I’m pretty sure it’s a lucid dream. In that dream, Camel chatted with me, he wants to order some special ice cream for his boss. I was responding to him like the way I’m responding to him now, I mean it’s a continuation of the stage in which we are in. He wanted to order something for his boss, some extremely rare type of flavor.

I was asking for specific information, and how to deliver etc … I told him that I never do special orders, because for each and every recipe, I need to test and re-test until it’s okay for mass Production. And even then, I changed each and every recipe for a couple more times. I was telling him that I only do this because he was telling me to, that he’s special and I would like to make this special food as requested.

The interesting thing about this was after this conversation, I opened my eyes as if I haven’t slept. I was as if I was typing with him in real time. Camel has recently appeared in my dream quite a number of time. I cannot recall all of the dream but it was a lot, as if it was a usual visit. Strange eh?

I cannot explain the meaning behind this dream, it was a very vivid dream. The conversation is so vivid too. At times, I wonder if his unconscious visits me despite his conscious order?

It was very intense in the past 2 days that my mind is really exhausted. You can see that the writing in this blog is scattered and has very limited emotions. I guess I’m truly exhausted, we will talk more tomorrow 🙂